Worry

 

It was a week – a week filled with many emotions.  At times, there was celebration and joy.  Other times there was heartache and sadness.  Times of laughter and times of crying.  Our lives bring many ups and downs.  Yet, when they happen within hours of each other, it can take a toll on our emotions.  That was my week.   I woke up Saturday morning exhausted, trying to rationalize the efforts of the week and determining what I could have done differently, what I could have done better.  I reviewed the events many times.  Although I was exhausted, there was a common thread – worry.

Progressing through the week, I realized that upon each event, the happy ones along with the ones filled with sadness, there was worry.  Worrying can be consuming.  Worry can be exhausting.  As I walked into each day, I realized that there was an element of worry for each situation – providing the emotional exhaustion I was feeling.  This worrying feeling is actually something with which I am familiar.  For all of the strides I try to make to live my life as God wants me to, I fail in this area.  I may give my worry to God, only to ‘take it back’ when what I gave to him is not fulfilled the way “I” want it to be fulfilled or in the timeline “I” had.

This week, I tried something different.  I entered each day with specific prayers for the day.  Knowing what the day entailed, I prayed for specifics.  Once I reflected back, I realized that God had actually answered my prayers – each and every day!!  I decided to take a step out of the worry and into God’s grace at the beginning of each day.  He heard my prayers and provided for me.  Yet, I fell back upon the stressors I have always felt – the worry I always had in these situations.  How foolish of me!  God provided for me, just as I asked, and I slipped back into a feeling of worry that there was no need for!

Has this happened to you?  You pray for God’s grace, God’s mercy, God’s help, and He delivers!  Yet, you continue to live your life as you did prior to his answered prayers out of habit.  God gives us the strength to live past bad habits.  He delivers us from the “old ways and provides a new beginning” for each of us, free from our hold habits.  It is in our free will that we need to move past those habits, even when it comes to worry.

I learned something this week – that the blessings of answered prayers give us the opportunity to be freed from the chains of old habits and to live in God’s light.  Yes, it was an exhausting week, but God delivered me and others.  I need to spend less time worrying about when and how God will show up and realize He is there for each and every minute.  My trust has to be that His blessings will outshine my worry, for His goodness and His grace.  Let us work on seeing God’s hand in all that encompasses our lives, realizing that the old habits we have can be thrown out and His new mercies will shine!

Heavenly Father, thank you for answering prayers.  Please open my eyes and my heart to see the answers you provide.  Help me to rid the worry of my life and lift the bad habits associated with worry.  Let me see Your light shining through challenging times, and may my voice be raised in praise.