Trust Fall

                                         katenixon.theworldrace.org

My family and I were watching a show the other day.  It involved some people who were willing to fall back into another person - thereby stating that they "trusted" the person enough not to look back, but to trust that they would catch them when they would fall back into their arms.  They needed to trust that the person would be there, that they wouldn't walk away, that they were strong enough to hold them up from the floor. My husband and I have been a part of many teamwork and team building exercises through work and other groups where this particular exercise has been utilized - sometimes with total strangers.  It's amazing how much trust someone will put into a total stranger to actually catch them from falling.  There is not doubt that they will actually be there for you.

This got me thinking about our trust with our Lord.  How many times do we say we "trust" that God will be there for us, to protect us, to provide for us, to comfort us, to love us, to forgive us?  Yet, when it is actually time to "fall" into His arms, to truly let God handle it all, how many times have we actually fallen back into God's loving arms?  Have we always trusted that he would be there to catch us?  Or have we taken that "look back" to see if He was there, and doubted if he truly was, and then proceeded on our own path (only to find out that it wasn't the right one)?  Take some time and reflect on those situations in our lives when God whispered to us, or maybe even SHOUTED to us, to trust Him, to fall back into his protective arms, and we chose to not trust Him?

I know I have done this - on numerous occasions.  There have been plenty of times in my life when I SAID that I trusted God, that I KNEW in my mind that He would be there for me, yet, when it actually came time to trust God versus MY way, I couldn't let go, I couldn't fall back.  It wasn't until I was at the true edge of the cliff many times, when I had no where else to go, that I finally let go and trusted that God was going to be there for me - and He NEVER disappointed.  Reflecting back, I believe one of those times was after my third chemo treatment when I had cancer.  I decided I wasn't going to "fall back" into the trusting arms of God anymore in that situation. 

The diagnosis of breast cancer at age 36 was a difficult one to hear.  Yet I believed, truly believed, that this was the time when I was going to trust God, that He was going to see me through - that His plan to use this diagnosis as a way of bringing me on a path that He planned for me was going to come to fruition.  I was going to listen to Him, and my doctors, to beat this and live my life.  A bounty of tests were ordered - I did them dutifully.  Surgery - check.  Chemo - scared, but moving forward.  It was after my third treatment that I decided I didn't want to do this any more.  I was sick, I was tired, I could not see the benefit of this treatment plan.  I checked in with God - told Him what I was doing.  I walked into my oncologist and told her, "I'm done - I am not going for the fourth round."  I had made my decision.  God might have been in charge before, but I didn't want this anymore.  I was taking control.  

It was then, that God spoke.  Not directly to me, but certainly through my oncologist.  She has the sweetest, softest voice - typically.  Yet, on that day, she boldly stated to me, "You will go through with the fourth round, because each step of the way, is meant to save your life.  It is meant for you to see your children grow up.  It is meant for you to enjoy life.  You need to have faith, simple faith, and trust."  It was then that I realized I had taken back what I had given to God at the beginning of that journey - I had taken back the trust I had given Him.  I listened to her, I trusted the one that I could trust - God.  I went for my fourth round of chemo (nope - didn't like the fourth round either).  I also did the weeks of radiation and medication that followed.  That was almost 14 years ago.  We need to trust.

If we are willing to take the "trust fall" with our family, friends, co-workers and sometimes, total strangers, what is stopping us from taking the "trust fall" with the one that we know will be there for us ALWAYS - past this earthly life to our heavenly home?  Take the fall with God - trust Him with your life.  He will always be there for you, simply have faith that His loving arms are waiting to catch you.  

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight." (NIV) Proverbs 3:5-6